Selfish people rarely step up in critical situations and do something selfless at a heroic level.

Most people don’t want to follow a selfish leader.  And most of us don’t want to be considered a selfish leader either. That’s why it’s alarming how many stories about selfish leaders I hear when I am working with leadership teams across the country.  I get to interact with law enforcement leaders, fire and rescue leaders, and business leaders.  They all tell crazy stories of leaders who think they deserve special attention or special benefits. 

These selfish leaders can claim that they are in charge. They have people who comply with their wishes.  But those people are not committed.  The difference between a compliant group and a committed team is often the selfishness or Selflessness of that leader.

A selfless leader builds trust and credibility with the people they are called to lead.  Each of us is in danger at times of looking out for ourselves first and failing the people we are called to lead.  We need to be intentional about Selflessness.

We define Selflessness as, “puttting the needs of others before our own needs, desires, or convenience.”

Every day, we all face these tests.  Selfish people rarely step up in critical situations and do something selfless at a heroic level.  The people who are selfless in the small things are prepared to be selfless in the large moments.

Here are three tests that test our Selflessness as leaders.  If we pass them, we will be prepared for the big moments when Selflessness could be critical.

1. Sacrifice Your Time:  The time you spend with somebody sends a message about what you believe is important. If you are constantly looking at your watch or thinking about your next meeting when someone else is speaking to you, your message is, “They don’t matter.”  One of the best ways to show them you care is to sacrifice your time for them.
2. Ask More Questions:  When you are with somebody, who does most of the talking? Some leaders talk more than they listen. Getting their point of view across is more important than hearing what the other person has to say.  Be selfless and ask them about their day, their opinion, and then listen.
3. Work Hard to Understand:  Too many people make it their priority to be heard rather than understand the other person.  Are you listening or just waiting to talk?  Are you leaving that conversation understanding more about them, or do they know more about you?  When someone feels heard and understood, they are more likely to buy into us and our leadership.

Selflessness takes practice.  These tests come daily. How we respond to these tests builds the habit of Selflessness or selfishness.  Would you rather follow a selfish leader or a selfless one?  This question applies at work and at home.

Question:

• Who do you need to exercise Selflessness with this week?
• How will passing these tests make you somebody others will want to follow?