When Venting Turns into Whining
We saw him as a whiner, a Debbie Downer, an Eeyore. He claimed he was venting. He believed it was his right to get his thoughts and feelings out of his head so he could move on. He wasn’t wrong. I wanted him to feel like he could vent. The problem was he’d moved from venting to whining. What’s the difference? Venting is a healthy means of letting loose of the pressure that is building up inside. It comes from the idea that a pressure cooker needs to be vented so that it does not blow up. That is a good idea for all of us when we are stressed out or angry about something that is out of our control. But venting a pressure cooker happens once. It is not a continuous, never ending process. This guy was not venting. He was telling everyone he met what was bothering him. He went from office to office, meeting to meeting, day after day and unloaded his issues on others. In other words, he was whining. The more he whined, the more he damaged his reputation inside the team and the more he dragged everyone else down. People started avoiding him. They tuned him out when he spoke at meetings. They began to talk about him behind his back. I had to pull him aside and let him know the damage his attitude was doing to himself and his team. The problem was he didn’t see it. He felt like it was his right to unleash his negativity on the people he ran into each day. The ironic thing was, some of the things bothering him were legitimate. But people had stopped listening because whining became who he was. To paraphrase Aristotle, “You are what you consistently do.” We all saw him as a whiner, a Debbie Downer, an Eeyore. Again, venting is about getting the negativity out of our system so we don’t blow up. It is not a license to wallow and whine. Once we vent, we need to choose Positvity. Positivity: Displaying a positive or “Can Do” attitude in all circumstances. The circumstances don’t change as a result of venting, but our attitudes should. What are we going to do in the midst of the circumstances? What are our solutions to make things better? How are we going to make the situation better even when others are whining? Our attitudes are a choice. After venting, it is time to make a different choice. Question: How can you and your team move from venting to Positivity? When is the next time you can set a positive example for others? FINALLY! Becoming a Leader of Character Audiobook is available on Audible. If you are an Audible user, then order it here: Order Audiobook on Audible You can also order on Spotify and Apple! Order Audiobook on Spotify Order Audiobook on Apple Audiobook sales have taken over for ebook sales. When we first published Becoming a Leader of Character in 2017, people were predicting ebooks were going to kill traditional hard copy print books. That didn’t happen. In fact, print books’ percentage of sales are very similar to what they were in 2017 when we first published. What has changed is that audiobooks have eaten away at ebook sales. Therefore, if you have been waiting on the audiobook version of Becoming a Leader of Character it is now here! You can get it on Spotify, Audible or any other major platform for audiobooks. While you drive or workout, marinate your brains in the Six Habits of Character – Courage, Humility, Integrity, Selflessness, Duty, and Positivity. Order now on your favorite platform: Character Counts! Dave Order Audiobook on Audible Order Audiobook on Spotify Order Audiobook on Apple
VLOG – A Leader’s Duty to Discuss a Team’s Values
Unless a leader discusses and reinforces the values they claim to have, that team will rarely have a culture that reflects those values. A leader who allows culture to happen by accident will is not exercise their Duty. Cultural drift happens without a leader’s attention. Watch the 87 second video and take action to shape your culture. FINALLY! Becoming a Leader of Character Audiobook is available on Audible. If you are an Audible user, then order it here: Order Audiobook on Audible You can also order on Spotify and Apple! Order Audiobook on Spotify Order Audiobook on Apple Audiobook sales have taken over for ebook sales. When we first published Becoming a Leader of Character in 2017, people were predicting ebooks were going to kill traditional hard copy print books. That didn’t happen. In fact, print books’ percentage of sales are very similar to what they were in 2017 when we first published. What has changed is that audiobooks have eaten away at ebook sales. Therefore, if you have been waiting on the audiobook version of Becoming a Leader of Character it is now here! You can get it on Spotify, Audible or any other major platform for audiobooks. While you drive or workout, marinate your brains in the Six Habits of Character – Courage, Humility, Integrity, Selflessness, Duty, and Positivity. Order now on your favorite platform: Character Counts! Dave Order Audiobook on Audible Order Audiobook on Spotify Order Audiobook on Apple
If You are Drifting, You are About to Crash
You never drift your way into excellence in anything in your life. A boat drifts into the reef. A car drifts into the snow bank. A balloon drifts to nowhere. Drifting is a recipe for disaster. If you are drifting, you are about to crash. There are few things in our lives that you can control. Your character is one of those controllable things. Are you drifting? We have done the surveys. Every group we work with for the last decade, whether it be with law enforcement, the fire services, or in the business world all agree – they want Leaders of Character in their lives. But Leaders of Character do not accidentally build their character. Character is not a result of the luck of the draw nor is character inherited. Character comes from intentionality. You have to DO what you want to BE. Every day and in every circumstance, you have an opportunity to choose something that will positively impact your character or negatively impact your character. That is why centuries ago, the Stoic philosophers told us our character is built upon our habits. And our habits begin with the intentional choices we make every day. Courage: Do you choose to confront the bad attitude of a co-worker or not? Humility: Do you listen to feedback from others without getting defensive? Integrity: Do you tell the cop how fast you were really going? Selflessness: Do you get off the couch and do the dishes after your spouse cooked dinner? Duty: Do you pick up the ice cube that fell on the floor? Positivity: Do you find a way to encourage others when you are all stuck in a bad circumstance? All of these choices take intentionality. Just like getting in shape, you have to be intentional about your workouts. You need to take the opportunity to exercise when it presents itself. Otherwise, the muscle doesn’t get stronger and it slowly atrophes. The more you exercise the Habits of Character on a daily basis, the stronger they get. When you actively choose to exercise Courage, to exercise Integrity or to exercise Positivity, you are building a muscle that will be there when the big tests in life come your way. The question is, will you be intentional with your choices or will you continue to drift? You never drift your way into excellence in anything in your life. The great news is that no matter how long you have been drifting you can pick up the paddle and start taking control of what direction you are heading. Are you heading towards becoming the person you would want to follow? Are you paddling towards being the leader, the parent or the spouse others want to follow? Now you know the formula. It comes down to your habits and your habits are formed from your daily intentional choices. With each choice, it becomes easier to make that choice again and again until you are no longer thinking about those choices – because they have become your habits. And you have become a Leader of Character. Question: What intentional choices will you make today to start building those muscles? Take our character assessment at www.MYCHARACTERTEST.com and identify where you need to focus. FINALLY! Becoming a Leader of Character Audiobook is available on Audible. If you are an Audible user, then order it here: Order Audiobook on Audible You can also order on Spotify and Apple! Order Audiobook on Spotify Order Audiobook on Apple Audiobook sales have taken over for ebook sales. When we first published Becoming a Leader of Character in 2017, people were predicting ebooks were going to kill traditional hard copy print books. That didn’t happen. In fact, print books’ percentage of sales are very similar to what they were in 2017 when we first published. What has changed is that audiobooks have eaten away at ebook sales. Therefore, if you have been waiting on the audiobook version of Becoming a Leader of Character it is now here! You can get it on Spotify, Audible or any other major platform for audiobooks. While you drive or workout, marinate your brains in theSix Habits of Character – Courage, Humility, Integrity, Selflessness, Duty, and Positivity. Order now on your favorite platform: Character Counts! Dave Order Audiobook on Audible Order Audiobook on Spotify Order Audiobook on Apple
VLOG – The Challenge of Leading a Former Peer
Leading a former peer is hard. Challenging an old friend to get better or fix a behavior takes Courage. It can also require Humility if you used to do the same thing as a peer. Watch this 112 second “How To” video. FINALLY! Becoming a Leader of Character Audiobook is available on Audible. If you are an Audible user, then order it here: Order Audiobook on Audible You can also order on Spotify and Apple! Order Audiobook on Spotify Order Audiobook on Apple Audiobook sales have taken over for ebook sales. When we first published Becoming a Leader of Character in 2017, people were predicting ebooks were going to kill traditional hard copy print books. That didn’t happen. In fact, print books’ percentage of sales are very similar to what they were in 2017 when we first published. What has changed is that audiobooks have eaten away at ebook sales. Therefore, if you have been waiting on the audiobook version of Becoming a Leader of Character it is now here! You can get it on Spotify, Audible or any other major platform for audiobooks. While you drive or workout, marinate your brains in theSix Habits of Character – Courage, Humility, Integrity, Selflessness, Duty, and Positivity. Order now on your favorite platform: Character Counts! Dave Order Audiobook on Audible Order Audiobook on Spotify Order Audiobook on Apple
The Difference Between a Compliant Group and a Committed Team
Which do you want to lead – a compliant group or a committed team? I see this dynamic in the fire service, in law enforcement, in the military, and in businesses. You can have two groups who make the same pay, work the same hours, use the same equipment, and have the same skills. But one is a compliant group and one is a committed team. There is only one difference between the two groups – the leader. We’ve all seen how the compliant group operates. This group does things because they have to, and they usually only do the minimum. They wait to be told what to do. They rarely work outside of their assigned tasks. They are unlikely to take a risk or take the initiative. The members of the group drag themselves into work, and they rarely perform above average. By contrast the committed team does things differently. They do things because they want to, and they usually go above and beyond expectations. They need little guidance. They see something that needs done, and they do it. They don’t hesitate to take action. They seem to enjoy their work, and they produce at a high level. If we flipped the leaders of these two organizations, the compliant group would become a committed team and the committed team would become a compliant group. As leaders we make choices that determine whether people are only compliant or whether they are committed. The culture of those groups hinge on who we are as a leader. Compliant Group Leaders Micromanage Make people earn their trust Train competence only: skills/tactics Argue with feedback Pragmatic decisions Prevent mistakes Avoid hard conversations Harp on errors-rarely celebrate successes Treat people like tools Committed Team Leaders Let people make their own decisions Are the first to trust Train competence and develop leaders Accept feedback Pragmatic decisions filtered through values Expect mistakes with growth afterwards Provide real feedback Encourage more and correct less Treat people like teammates Which column do you fall under? If you find yourself leading a compliant group, it may be time to look in the mirror. When leaders exercise Humility and take a hard look at themselves, that is the first step to changing a compliant group into a committed team. Because the fastest way to change a team is to change the leader. Question: What changes do you need to make in order to build a committed team? Which Habit of Character will you need to exercise? Courage or Humility? FINALLY! Becoming a Leader of Character Audiobook is available on Audible. If you are an Audible user, then order it here: Order Audiobook on Audible You can also order on Spotify and Apple! Order Audiobook on Spotify Order Audiobook on Apple Audiobook sales have taken over for ebook sales. When we first published Becoming a Leader of Character in 2017, people were predicting ebooks were going to kill traditional hard copy print books. That didn’t happen. In fact, print books’ percentage of sales are very similar to what they were in 2017 when we first published. What has changed is that audiobooks have eaten away at ebook sales. Therefore, if you have been waiting on the audiobook version of Becoming a Leader of Character it is now here! You can get it on Spotify, Audible or any other major platform for audiobooks. While you drive or workout, marinate your brains in theSix Habits of Character – Courage, Humility, Integrity, Selflessness, Duty, and Positivity. Order now on your favorite platform: Character Counts! Dave Order Audiobook on Audible Order Audiobook on Spotify Order Audiobook on Apple
VLOG – The Humilty to Say “I Suck” at Something
Admitting your weaknesses does not hurt your credibility, it strengthens it. It is the naive leader who thinks that admitting weaknesses hurts their credibility. If you want to build your credibility, watch this 94 second video to see how the Courage and Humility to say “I suck” at something builds your credibility. FINALLY! Becoming a Leader of Character Audiobook is available on Audible. If you are an Audible user, then order it here: Order Audiobook on Audible You can also order on Spotify and Apple! Order Audiobook on Spotify Order Audiobook on Apple Audiobook sales have taken over for ebook sales. When we first published Becoming a Leader of Character in 2017, people were predicting ebooks were going to kill traditional hard copy print books. That didn’t happen. In fact, print books’ percentage of sales are very similar to what they were in 2017 when we first published. What has changed is that audiobooks have eaten away at ebook sales. Therefore, if you have been waiting on the audiobook version of Becoming a Leader of Character it is now here! You can get it on Spotify, Audible or any other major platform for audiobooks. While you drive or workout, marinate your brains in theSix Habits of Character – Courage, Humility, Integrity, Selflessness, Duty, and Positivity. Order now on your favorite platform: Character Counts! Dave Order Audiobook on Audible Order Audiobook on Spotify Order Audiobook on Apple
Leaders of Character Do Not Settle for What is Easy
The easy way is a cop out for leaders. I can succumb to taking the easy way. I let internal arguments be settled by what seems the easiest. At those moments, I have to realize that the hard thing is what a Leader of Character decides to do. It is easier to: stay in my comfort zone. do what I think is right for me. stay quiet when others make poor choices. Work on my priorities instead of helping others. Tell people what to do instead of coaching them how to do it. Join in the gossip instead of changing the narrative to something productive. When you have a choice between easy and hard choices, what choices do you make? Those choices will either bring you closer or further from your calling to be a Leader of Character. There is nothing easy about exercising character. But it is a leader’s Duty to choose the harder path. Duty: Taking action based on your assigned tasks and moral obligations. When reading stories about great leaders like Abraham Lincoln, Dietrich Bonnhoeffer, Margaret Thatcher, and other leaders, I never see them taking the easy way. They all saw their Duty and did it even when it was the harder choice. Our day to day lives give us opportunities to choose the harder things. Everyday we have opportunities to choose between: Courage or comfort Humility or pride Integrity or hypocrisy Selflessness or selfishness Duty or unreliability Positivity or negativity The more we choose the hard things in life, the more we grow and become the leader we are called to be at work and at home. Fulfilling our moral obligations is usually harder than what the average person chooses to do. But a Leader of Character is not willing to settle for being an average person. Our workplaces, our homes, and our society need people who choose to do the hard things that others avoid. My hard thing today was to step out of my comfortable situation and make a difficult phone call. What will your hard thing be today? I want to encourage you to be the person you want to be by choosing the hard things in front of you. When you make that choice, you will be choosing a better version of yourself and a version of yourself that others will trust, believe in, and follow. Question: How often has choosing the easier thing gotten you in trouble? FINALLY! Becoming a Leader of Character Audiobook is available on Audible. If you are an Audible user, then order it here: Order Audiobook on Audible You can also order on Spotify and Apple! Order Audiobook on Spotify Order Audiobook on Apple Audiobook sales have taken over for ebook sales. When we first published Becoming a Leader of Character in 2017, people were predicting ebooks were going to kill traditional hard copy print books. That didn’t happen. In fact, print books’ percentage of sales are very similar to what they were in 2017 when we first published. What has changed is that audiobooks have eaten away at ebook sales. Therefore, if you have been waiting on the audiobook version of Becoming a Leader of Character it is now here! You can get it on Spotify, Audible or any other major platform for audiobooks. While you drive or workout, marinate your brains in theSix Habits of Character – Courage, Humility, Integrity, Selflessness, Duty, and Positivity. Order now on your favorite platform: Character Counts! Dave Order Audiobook on Audible Order Audiobook on Spotify Order Audiobook on Apple
VLOG – What NOT to Do If You’re Having a Bad Day
Everyone has a bad day. But how do we behave when we are having a bad day says something about our character. What choices we make can prove us to be selfish and negative or prove that we are a Leader of Character even in our bad days. Watch how I break this down in this 110 second video. FINALLY! Becoming a Leader of Character Audiobook is available on Audible. If you are an Audible user, then order it here: Order Audiobook on Audible You can also order on Spotify and Apple! Order Audiobook on Spotify Order Audiobook on Apple Audiobook sales have taken over for ebook sales. When we first published Becoming a Leader of Character in 2017, people were predicting ebooks were going to kill traditional hard copy print books. That didn’t happen. In fact, print books’ percentage of sales are very similar to what they were in 2017 when we first published. What has changed is that audiobooks have eaten away at ebook sales. Therefore, if you have been waiting on the audiobook version of Becoming a Leader of Character it is now here! You can get it on Spotify, Audible or any other major platform for audiobooks. While you drive or workout, marinate your brains in theSix Habits of Character – Courage, Humility, Integrity, Selflessness, Duty, and Positivity. Order now on your favorite platform: Character Counts! Dave Order Audiobook on Audible Order Audiobook on Spotify Order Audiobook on Apple
What If We Started By Giving Others the Benefit of the Doubt
Everyone else is not stupid. People who disagree with me are not evil. When someone makes a mistake, they are not incompetent. A person who has a different opinion is not dumb, uneducated, or trying to screw everyone else over. Unfortunately, the lower versions of ourselves jump to these conclusions about others. Even when they are someone we live with, we let our sinful, human nature assume the worst about them. When we jump to those negative conclusions, a few things happen and none of them are good. We don’t try to understand their point of view. We shut down any chance of productive problem solving. We fail to learn new ideas that they could provide. We damage relationships and break down trust. We become further and further alienated from those with whom we work and live. Everyone becomes less flexible, open minded, and teamwork dies. There is another way to approach these moments. However, they require both Humility and Positivity. Humility: Believing and acting like “it’s not about me.” Positivity: Display a positive or “can do” attitude in all circumstances. It’s a simple solution that could reverse the trends in our relationships and in our society. What if we just gave each other the benefit of the doubt? If we stopped making assumptions about the other person’s motives and assumed their best intentions, imagine where conversations could go. Imagine how people on opposite sides of an issue could begin with some common ground. Sales and Operations Command Staff and Union Representatives Christians and Muslims Democrats and Republicans Parents and Children Husbands and Wives Just because they are on “the other side” does not mean they have impure or bad motives. Now we can all agree that their point of view is coming from a different perspective than our own. But what if we started to try to understand where that perspective came from instead of making poor assumptions about their motives? “Help me understand where you are coming from…” “That hasn’t been my experience, but I’d like to hear about yours….” Imagine the productive dialogue that could happen when we begin by giving each other the benefit of the doubt. When we exercise the Humility to understand them you will see the acrimony that always seems to be just below the surface, go away. We will become civil. We will understand. We will still think good things about the other person even if we still don’t agree with them. Negativity between the two sides will become Positivity needed for people to find a way to make things work. The “Can Do” attitude will prevail and compromises will get done. We just need to give each other the benefit of the doubt. Question: Wouldn’t you like more people to give you the benefit of the doubt and listen to you? FINALLY! Becoming a Leader of Character Audiobook is available on Audible. If you are an Audible user, then order it here: Order Audiobook on Audible You can also order on Spotify and Apple! Order Audiobook on Spotify Order Audiobook on Apple Audiobook sales have taken over for ebook sales. When we first published Becoming a Leader of Character in 2017, people were predicting ebooks were going to kill traditional hard copy print books. That didn’t happen. In fact, print books’ percentage of sales are very similar to what they were in 2017 when we first published. What has changed is that audiobooks have eaten away at ebook sales. Therefore, if you have been waiting on the audiobook version of Becoming a Leader of Character it is now here! You can get it on Spotify, Audible or any other major platform for audiobooks. While you drive or workout, marinate your brains in theSix Habits of Character – Courage, Humility, Integrity, Selflessness, Duty, and Positivity. Order now on your favorite platform: Character Counts! Dave Order Audiobook on Audible Order Audiobook on Spotify Order Audiobook on Apple
VLOG – Extroverts – Pride and the Humility to Shut Up
“Just shut up!” is a quote I’ve heard to often in my life. I am like a lot of extroverts out there. I need to exercise the Humility to put other people first and SHUT UP. Watch the 97 second video below to hear more. FINALLY! Becoming a Leader of Character Audiobook is available on Audible. If you are an Audible user, then order it here: Order Audiobook on Audible You can also order on Spotify and Apple! Order Audiobook on Spotify Order Audiobook on Apple Audiobook sales have taken over for ebook sales. When we first published Becoming a Leader of Character in 2017, people were predicting ebooks were going to kill traditional hard copy print books. That didn’t happen. In fact, print books’ percentage of sales are very similar to what they were in 2017 when we first published. What has changed is that audiobooks have eaten away at ebook sales. Therefore, if you have been waiting on the audiobook version of Becoming a Leader of Character it is now here! You can get it on Spotify, Audible or any other major platform for audiobooks. While you drive or workout, marinate your brains in theSix Habits of Character – Courage, Humility, Integrity, Selflessness, Duty, and Positivity. Order now on your favorite platform: Character Counts! Dave Order Audiobook on Audible Order Audiobook on Spotify Order Audiobook on Apple
Emotional Decisions are Usually Poor Decisions
Your emotions will deceive you and cause you to fall short of your calling as a leader. I felt like roasting him! He was one of the most irritating peers I ever had. He was stubborn and full of himself. And in this case, he did not know what he was talking about. When I challenged him, he came back with a personal comment. I almost came across the table. But, I didn’t….this time. Unfortunately, I did let my feelings get the best of me a year earlier. In a very similar exchange, I got up from my chair and started moving towards his side of the table. My good friend and colleague, Mike, quickly stood up and brought calm back to the situation. It was an embarrassing moment for me. One that I vowed to learn from. Emotions can be a leader’s downfall if they don’t learn to control them. A leader who allows their emotions to make their decisions may get people to comply with their demands. But that leader will never be the Leader of Character those people want to commit to following. That leader will be inconsistent and cause people to walk on egg shells and not take risks. Your emotions will deceive you and cause you to fall short of your calling as a leader. It may not be as stupid as a physical altercation, but operating based on emotions will cause you to make unwise decisions. Anger: Will cause you to say the wrong thing at the wrong moment. Self Pity: Will cause you to turn inward and not pay attention to others. Frustration: Will cause you to roll your eyes or make hasty decisions. Impatience: Will cause you to jump in when others are figuring it out. Fear: WIll cause you to micromanage to avoid a loss of control. There is power in the pause. Taking that moment to step back from our emotions and ask ourselves, “What would a Leader of Character do right now?” At that moment, it is a leader’s moral obligation – Duty – to fight against an emotional choice. Duty: Taking action based on our assigned tasks and moral obligations. It is your Duty to filter your emotions and decide if emotions will make the decision for you or will you exercise Courage, Humility, Integrity, Selflessness, Duty, and/or Positivity despite how you feel at that moment. It will not be easy to avoid those emotional responses if you are in the habit of letting them win those battles inside you. But, when you pause and make the choice that a Leader of Character would make, I promise you it will get easier the next time you do it. Pretty soon, you will have a new habit that will make you the leader you and everyone else will want to follow: A Leader of Character. Question: When was the last time you made an unwise decision based on your immediate emotions? Audiobook sales have taken over for ebook sales. When we first published Becoming a Leader of Character in 2017, people were predicting ebooks were going to kill traditional hard copy print books. That didn’t happen. In fact, print books’ percentage of sales are very similar to what they were in 2017 when we first published. What has changed is that audiobooks have eaten away at ebook sales. Therefore, if you have been waiting on the audiobook version of Becoming a Leader of Character it is now here! You can get it on Spotify, Audible or any other major platform for audiobooks. While you drive or workout, marinate your brains in the Six Habits of Character – Courage, Humility, Integrity, Selflessness, Duty, and Positivity. Order now on your favorite platform: (Audible is coming soon!) Order Audiobook on Spotify Order Audiobook on Apple Audible: Will be available in the coming weeks. We will let you know as soon as Audible makes it available.
West Point’s 4th of July Prayer for Leaders
Forty-one years ago this week, I entered the United States Military Academy at West Point. We were the Class of 1988. In our first week, we had to learn the West Point Cadet Prayer. Jump forward to today. The Class of 2029 has begun their journey as part of the “Long Gray Line” and the West Point Cadet Prayer is still an important guide for today’s cadets. In honor of Independence Day and the men and women who serve allowing us the freedom to speak and to pray as we see fit, I would like to share The West Point Cadet Prayer. Before you read it, ask yourself: “What challenge does this prayer offer me? Whether you are a person of faith or not, this challenge is open for you. Duty – Honor – Country. These three core values of West Point have stood the test of time for the last two centuries. The West Point Cadet Prayer is used by graduates as a reminder of these and other values which are meant to form the character of our nation’s future leaders. I would like to welcome you to let this prayer challenge you as you and your family reflect during our nation’s holiday. The West Point Cadet Prayer “O God, our Father, thou Searcher of human hearts, help us to draw near to Thee in sincerity and truth. May our religion be filled with gladness and may our worship of Thee be natural. Strengthen and increase our admiration for honest dealing and clean thinking, and suffer not our hatred of hypocrisy and pretense ever to diminish. Encourage us in our endeavor to live above the common level of life. Make us to choose the harder right instead of the easier wrong, and never to be content with a half-truth when the whole can be won. Endow us with courage that is born of loyalty to all that is noble and worthy, that scorns to compromise with vice and injustice and knows no fear when truth and right are in jeopardy. Guard us against flippancy and irreverence in the sacred things of life. Grant us new ties of friendship and new opportunities of service. Kindle our hearts in fellowship with those of a cheerful countenance, and soften our hearts with sympathy for those who sorrow and suffer. Help us to maintain the honor of the Corps untarnished and unsullied and to show forth in our lives the ideals of West Point in doing our duty to Thee and to our Country. All of which we ask in the name of the Great Friend and Master of all. Amen” From our team to you and your family, Happy Independence Day! Dig Deep Question: How many different character challenges does this prayer present to you, your family or your team? What portion of the prayer challenges you the most? Here is a quick assessment that will take you 5 minutes to figure it out. Nobody will ever see your results but you. Warning: If you are not going to be honest with yourself this is a worthless assessment. To take the assessment use the QR code above or go to www.MYCHARACTERTEST.com
VLOG – The Courage to Trust First – Even Though You Could Get Burned
Nobody trusts somebody who doesn’t trust them. Yet, even though many leaders want to be trusted, they don’t trust their people first. Could you get burned? Yes. But without trust, your team will never go beyond being average. It depends on the Courage of the leader to trust first. Watch the next 87 second video to hear more. Audiobook sales have taken over for ebook sales. When we first published Becoming a Leader of Character in 2017, people were predicting ebooks were going to kill traditional hard copy print books. That didn’t happen. In fact, print books’ percentage of sales are very similar to what they were in 2017 when we first published. What has changed is that audiobooks have eaten away at ebook sales. Therefore, if you have been waiting on the audiobook version of Becoming a Leader of Character it is now here! You can get it on Spotify, Audible or any other major platform for audiobooks. While you drive or workout, marinate your brains in the Six Habits of Character – Courage, Humility, Integrity, Selflessness, Duty, and Positivity. Order now on your favorite platform: (Audible is coming soon!) Order Audiobook on Spotify Order Audiobook on Apple Audible: Will be available in the coming weeks. We will let you know as soon as Audible makes it available.
Leaders – What If You Are Wrong?
Believe it or not, sometimes leaders get it wrong. All leaders are wrong sometimes. Do you know why? Because they are human. We are human, and we are not perfect. So why do some leaders refuse to listen to others? Why do some leaders resist changing their plans when somebody brings them new information? Why can’t we all just start from a point of view “I could be wrong.” The answer is: Pride. The success that leaders have experienced in the past often causes them to cross the line from confidence into unbridled pride – in other words, arrogance. It’s a lesson I have to learn again and again. I work with very smart and wise people on our Becoming a Leader of Character team. But, I realize there are times when my confidence turns to arrogance. I may have an idea or a strategy that I love. I get excited and lay out a course of action. But, when they challenge me, instead of listening to them, I dig in my heels. I want what I want. I see their input as a challenge, and I like to win challenges. Therefore, I shut them down or shut them out. This is the ugly side of me and maybe a lot of leaders out there. But what if we did it differently? What if we started out by asking ourselves, “What if I am wrong?” Exercising Humility and having the self awareness to realize that being wrong is a possibility will help us in a lot of ways. People will feel affirmed and important. They will bring us a new perspective that we don’t have. We will encourage them and empower them to be part of the solution. They will trust us more because they know we make decisions with more complete information. We will avoid preventable mistakes. We will become wiser because we have more input from wise people. The team will be better. Our families will be better. The only reason to not adopt the “What if I am wrong?” perspective is arrogance. We are too proud to admit our own potential for mistakes. We are unwilling to be challenged by others. We are blind to our own shortcomings. If more leaders began by asking themselves “What if I am wrong?” imagine the productive dialogue we’d have among leaders in politics, businesses, government agencies and in our homes! Imagine the positive give and take between people who make critical decisions. Imagine the buy-in to those decisions once they are made. It just takes some Humility from the leaders. Question: When was the last time you let yourself believe you might be wrong? Did it build up or tear down your relationship with others? Audiobook sales have taken over for ebook sales. When we first published Becoming a Leader of Character in 2017, people were predicting ebooks were going to kill traditional hard copy print books. That didn’t happen. In fact, print books’ percentage of sales are very similar to what they were in 2017 when we first published. What has changed is that audiobooks have eaten away at ebook sales. Therefore, if you have been waiting on the audiobook version of Becoming a Leader of Character it is now here! You can get it on Spotify, Audible or any other major platform for audiobooks. While you drive or workout, marinate your brains in the Six Habits of Character – Courage, Humility, Integrity, Selflessness, Duty, and Positivity. Order now on your favorite platform: (Audible is coming soon!) Order Audiobook on Spotify Order Audiobook on Apple Audible: Will be available in the coming weeks. We will let you know as soon as Audible makes it available.
Is Being on Time Really That Hard?
Choosing to work on your chronic lateness is a good place to work on your character. Why are some people always on time and others are always late? Sure there are unforeseen circumstances that can make anyone late. But there are certain people we all expect to be late. It is predictable. It is also annoying. There is not a “late gene” that makes being late unavoidable. Some personalities are less organized than others. In fact, I am that person. There are a lot of people who know me who will snicker at my difficulty with remembering specifics and dealing with little details. But, I also have a reputation for being on time, even early, for everything. From personal experience, I know that my personality does not make me late. It could contribute to being late if I don’t care about being on time. But, I am intentional and overcome that disorganized part of my personality. People who are consistently late are not fighting a hereditary issue or a personality flaw. They are fighting an issue of character. The issues are selfishness and pride. The antidotes are Selflessness and Humility. Most of us who are on time can describe the selfishness of always being late. They don’t see how their lateness affects others, or they don’t care. They believe their time is more important than our time. They refuse to put in the same amount of effort as we do to arrive on time. But how are these people losing the battle against pride? They know they have a problem, yet they choose not to work at getting better. They apologize and then do it again the next time. People who refuse to grow in areas of weakness, make it all about them. Some of you reading this are probably saying, “Dang! Dave must have had someone show up late recently.” Maybe. But we all know those people. Maybe that person is looking you in the mirror each morning. I want to encourage you! You can get better at this. Your willingness to work on this bad habit tells others you do care about them and you recognize you should and can do better. Winston Churchill once said, “Character may be manifested in the great moments, but it is made in the small ones.” Being late may seem like a small thing, but it is these small choices that we make that set us up for success in the big moments to come. Deciding to grow in this small area is a window into your character. It is a window because you are choosing to put others first and exercise Selflessness. It is a window because you are deciding that being late is not “good enough”. You can get better and you see the need to make those changes. People don’t consider us reliable when we can be counted on in some areas and not in others. If you want to be a reliable leader, coworker, friend or parent, choosing to work on your chronic lateness is a good place to begin working on your character. Question When someone is always late, do you think of them as reliable? What damage does their lateness do to your relationship with them? Audiobook sales have taken over for ebook sales. When we first published Becoming a Leader of Character in 2017, people were predicting ebooks were going to kill traditional hard copy print books. That didn’t happen. In fact, print books’ percentage of sales are very similar to what they were in 2017 when we first published. What has changed is that audiobooks have eaten away at ebook sales. Therefore, if you have been waiting on the audiobook version of Becoming a Leader of Character it is now here! You can get it on Spotify, Audible or any other major platform for audiobooks. While you drive or workout, marinate your brains in the Six Habits of Character – Courage, Humility, Integrity, Selflessness, Duty, and Positivity. Order now on your favorite platform: (Audible is coming soon!) Order Audiobook on Spotify Order Audiobook on Apple Audible: Will be available in the coming weeks. We will let you know as soon as Audible makes it available.
