“I am being bullied and I wish my supervisor would do something about it.”  Bullying isn’t just an issue on the playgrounds for middle schoolers.  It happens to adults as well. It can happen anywhere immature adults work. Attorneys’ offices, engineering firms, and government offices are not immune.   It is childish behavior that usually originates from individuals who are ruled by fear, pride, and/or insecurity. Just like children. 

The above quote just happened to come from a fire department employee. I am not going to address the bullies in this blog.  I am addressing the supervisors who are responsible for stopping the behavior.

What do you do with a bully on your team?  Supervisors, this is a test of your character.  I ask you, “Will you pass this test?” 

A Supervisor’s Character Test: Responding to Workplace Bullying

If you are an inexperienced supervisor or even a grizzled veteran, your Duty – your moral obligation in this situation is to take action.  Doing nothing and saying nothing is a failure of your character.  Here are the Habits of Character that are being tested when you have a bully on your team:

Courage:  Acting despite perceived or actual risk.

Humility:  Believing and acting like “it’s not about me”.

Integrity:  Doing what is good, right and proper, even at personal cost.

Selflessness:  Putting the needs of others before our own needs, desires or convenience.

Duty:  Taking action based on our assigned tasks and moral obligations.

Do You Have the Courage to Stop Workplace Bullying?

By this time in your career, you’ve witnessed someone being bullied. Unfortunately, past leaders may have let it go.  But now, you are the leader who must step out and take the lead when nobody else has.  You are the one who pulls the bully to the side and corrects the behavior.

Most bullies stop when confronted by a person with the Courage to address them directly.  You need to be clear with the consequences if the behavior continues. And if it does, you have to have the Courage to follow through on those consequences.

Do You Have the Humility to Admit Past Mistakes

If the bullying has been going on under your nose, you need to own that.  If you used to do the same thing, you need to own that as well. How do you correct someone for something you used to do? The bottom line is it takes Humility.

When a leader takes responsibility for their past actions (or inaction) that disarms the bully. Bullies often deflect their own culpability by blaming others, including you.  When you own your past, you can hold people to higher standards in the future.  Without Humility, you will be a hypocrite.

Do You Have the Integrity to Maintain Standards?

Everybody knows bullying is wrong.  You probably have policies and training sessions about the topic.  A “No Bullying” policy is a pretty low standard to have among adults.  But when someone ignores the standard, the leader’s Integrity is being challenged. You must fix the slipping standards as soon as you recognize them.

When a leader claims to have standards, every violation of those standards is a test of their Integrity.  If a leader corrects some violations and ignores others, that creates inconsistency and undermines the leadership of others who are upholding the standards.

Will You Be Selfless and Put Others Before Yourself

Addressing bullying is going to be uncomfortable.  Especially if you have never addressed it before.  But Leaders of Character don’t avoid uncomfortable things. If your discomfort stops you from addressing the bullying, that is a selfish act.  Because you just put your comfort before the needs of someone on your team. They placed trust in you and came to you about the bullying. Your discomfort should not make your decisions as their leader.

Exercising Selflessness means you do the hard thing and the right thing because you care about the people you lead. You place their needs before your own comfort or convenience.

Will You Exercise the Duty to Act?

Once you have a bully on your team, it is your moral obligation to take action.  Whether you do or you don’t address the bully is a direct reflection on who you are.  It will set the tone for your leadership journey moving forward.  And it will determine whether people can trust you to maintain a culture where people can come to work without being threatened by egocentric, fearful, and/or insecure co-workers.

The Duty to act is not a buzzword.  It is a mirror into the character of the leader.  When the leader stops this behavior, it reveals to everyone who that leader is at his or her core. 

Bullying is a Test of the Leader’s Character

It is sad that we have to address an issue among adults that should have been handled in middle school.  But instead of bemoaning the lack of action by overworked and underpaid teachers, we should look in the mirror and decide that it stops with us.

Leaders, one conversation can stop the behavior and rebuild a broken group into a cohesive unit.  The bully will no longer wield the most influence on the team. And the culture will begin to reflect the character you exercised.  Your example is a powerful tool for defining your team’s culture.

Question:

• When have you seen a bully have a negative impact on the team?
• What would have happened if somebody had stopped the bullying?